How to Eat a Muffin

This morning the Best Husband Ever and I headed to one of our favorite coffee shops-come-bakery, Break Espresso, for a treat-ish breakfast and a round of Scrabble. He munched on, in our shared opinions, an overly pecan-ed caramel roll and some Montana-produced tea. I enjoyed a blackberry bran muffin with black coffee. It's been a while since I partook of this particular muffin, and it was both a welcome comfort and slightly unsettling that it tasted exactly like the last one I remember eating, which must have occurred at least one year ago, if not longer.

We all know that I love the muffin. I also have a specific muffin-munching method to go with my madness. Here is more information about my muffin infatuation than you ever wanted to know. Be that as it may -- I think it enhances the enjoyment of the muffin, don't you?

How to Eat a Muffin, Muffin Love-Style
  1. Purchase/bake/thieve muffin of your choice.
  2. Place on plate.
  3. Flip.
  4. Remove any wrapper/baking cup so that said muffin is completely au naturel.
  5. Ruthlessly wrest the "butt" of the muffin from its top.
  6. Devour the sub-par botttom of muffin with a fork. Ignore the muffin top if it trembles in fear at its certain doom.
  7. Grin wickedly at the muffin top, then enjoy it in all of its perfectly-textured glory.
  8. Ingest any fallen crumbs from empty plate.
  9. Heave a sigh of contentment and smack your lips in the most expansive manner possible.

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